Jones Cola unleashes a Sneak Attack +1d6

Peter G. 14 Jan, 2010 at 2:32am ET Article published in Life

Wench! I demand 12oz of your finest pure cane soda for my friends and I for we are weary and our quest is long.

Jones Cola has released a special batch of Dungeons & Dragons-themed sodas. With names like Dwarven Draught, Sneak Attack, and Bigby’s Thirst Quenching Destroyer, and bottle art that looks like it’s straight from the Player’s Handbook, the limited edition drinks really capture the spirit of the game. But loot like this never lasts long, so parties interested in this quest should accept it quickly. The limited time offer is bound to disappear soon.

6-packs are $10.99 + shipping while 12-packs are $18.99 + shipping.

And like any item creation, it takes time. The artisans at Jones suggest it’ll take around two weeks to get their new brew to you once you’ve ordered. That’s the price you pay for good pop with no high-fructose corn syrup.

Comments

14 Jan 2010 ~ 7:34am Zuntar My nephew loves Jones soda's. The thanksgiving dinner pack was every bit as nasty as it sounds!!
14 Jan 2010 ~ 10:56am Cliff_Forster $10.99 is a bit much for a good six pack of beer. I just can't pay that for soda, even if its got major geek cred.
14 Jan 2010 ~ 10:58am Thrax Want.
14 Jan 2010 ~ 12:18pm Kwitko I use my +3 Tastebuds of Kwitko.
14 Jan 2010 ~ 7:21pm ardichoke fukken sold.
14 Jan 2010 ~ 8:31pm yagga I don't think Jones uses normal real cane sugar, despite the real sugar claim on its packaging. FYI

And aren't the sodas cheaper than 10.99/18.99 in an actual store?
14 Jan 2010 ~ 9:06pm ardichoke They may be cheaper in the store but they don't sell their "special" packs in stores. The only way to get them is to order them from Jones usually. As for your skepticism of the real cane sugar bit, if they list pure cane sugar in the ingredients (and they do) then that's what they use. If not the FDA wouldn't allow them to sell their product in US stores.
15 Jan 2010 ~ 2:37pm Colgere Me want.
15 Jan 2010 ~ 3:53pm AlexDeGruven

Cliff_Forster wrote:

$10.99 is a bit much for a good six pack of beer. I just can't pay that for soda, even if its got major geek cred.

I'm not sure what you consider good beer, but $11 would be a bit light for my tastes.

On Topic: The Thanksgiving set was nasty in an awesome way. There are some things that just should not be tasted in fizzy form, and most of them were of those things.
15 Jan 2010 ~ 10:08pm yagga ardichoke, I found what I was thinking of...

It's "inverted sugar," a sort of manufacturing of the sugar, I think to make it more like a high-fructose-corn-syrup.

I don't really know the details, except that I've glanced online saying it was as bad hfcs.

To be fair to Jones, I've only had the rootbeer, and in the can form, and it was better than average, but still no where near the best.
16 Jan 2010 ~ 2:10pm ardichoke They also have sugar free sodas too which I find to be quite tasty compared to other sugar free sodas. Mmm... splenda.
16 Jan 2010 ~ 2:24pm GHoosdum An "inverted sugar" is simply a compound sugar that has been broken down into its components.

For example, table sugar (sucrose) is made of two molecules tied together: A glucose molecule and a fructose molecule. When you turn it into an invert sugar, you're simply taking those molecules apart. Curiously, invert table sugar is sweeter than its granular form. The easiest way to make cane sugar an invert sugar is to mix it with water and boil it (this makes simple syrup). I'd assume any soda that uses real cane sugar and processes it with heat is going to produce an invert sugar.

The truth is, however, an invert sugar is no worse for you than an equal amount of its base form. Unfortunately, as CB showed us in this post, even pure cane sugar is as bad as HFCS for the body.
23 Feb 2010 ~ 12:39pm sharkydart Like anything way too tasty for its(your) own good... "moderation".